Leaving a Pure Legacy

Have you ever desired to leave a legacy behind? To have an impact that outlasts your time with a group, on a team, in a job, or even in life itself? Many of us seek to “live beyond our years,” by impacting the world around us in a permanent way.

These can be noble goals and are certainly realized by those who serve the Lord their God with all of themselves—it is the natural outcome…it cannot be stopped. The issue that I find within myself and that you may find within yourself, as well, is that of desiring my legacy. We have erred immediately upon that thought.

“My Utmost For His Highest,” Feb 5:

ARE YOU READY TO BE OFFERED?

"Yea, and if I be offered upon the sacrifice and service of your faith, I joy and rejoice with you all." Philippians 2:17

Are you willing to be offered for the work of the faithful - to pour out your life blood as a libation on the sacrifice of the faith of others? Or do you say - "I am not going to be offered up just yet, I do not want God to choose my work. I want to choose the scenery of my own sacrifice; I want to have the right kind of people watching and saying, 'Well done.'

It is one thing to go on the lonely way with dignified heroism, but quite another thing if the line mapped out for you by God means being a door-mat under other people's feet. Suppose God wants to teach you to say, "I know how to be abased" - are you ready to be offered up like that? Are you ready to be not so much as a drop in a bucket - to be so hopelessly insignificant that you are never thought of again in connection with the life you served? Are you willing to spend and be spent; not seeking to be ministered unto, but to minister? Some saints cannot do menial work and remain saints because it is beneath their dignity.

Leaving a pure legacy means to leave an impact so centered on God that we are seen as insignificant—that we are seen only long enough for others to then see Christ, and we vanish behind His infinite light and glory. It means impacting the world around us for Christ, such that those who are impacted continue to see Him for eternity, and we are as a speck of dust or “drop in a bucket.” Indeed, that bucket was filled by a great many individual drops and each were chosen by God to play that small part—but me and my little drop have nothing to boast about ourselves. We instead can boast about the One who orchestrated the thousands of little drops like ourselves to fill this metaphorical bucket.

This “bucket” could be leading someone to Christ. Did we do that? Not hardly—we may have been the last drop that filled the bucket, but there were many drops before us paving the way, setting the foundation, filling the bucket. And we as “drops” in this bucket of another Spirit-filled soul merely fell where we were directed. God alone is to be praised for the work of grace for the newfound in Christ!

This “bucket” could be a ministry or volunteer position or opportunity. Again, did we do that? Is it our work that is so amazing? Not at all—it is the Lord’s amazing work that will continue with or without us—we are simply to be overwhelmingly thankful that we have been included! What a truth is this: God will not be deterred—not even by you and I, the stubborn part-time followers, insisting on our own way. Are we so important that if we disobey, the entire world will begin to crumble and all of God’s large and small purposes will not be fulfilled? God is sovereign—He rules all and is not dictated to by His creation. In disobedience, God will go right around you and I, and we will forfeit the glorious opportunity of obedience to His calling this very day. He doesn’t miss out—we do.

I know that you and I will continue to wrestle with the same pride and selfishness that rears its ugly head every time we are given the opportunity to do something for God. We may rightly love the service; but we must stop short of admiring our small little part. Doing so is like being invited to cut the ceremonial ribbon as a mansion’s completion is revealed. We are invited to join the master of the mansion inside, and by cutting the ribbon as he has asked, we have been made a part of all who are brought off the street to enter his mansion. At this point, if we sit and marvel at how well we cut that ribbon, with what skill and smoothness we operated the scissors, we will miss the entire point. This illustration may sound ridiculous—it should. This is how ridiculous we act when we take pride in leaving a legacy of our own, even if it is in doing the Lord’s work. It’s like the ribbon cutter wanting everyone to remember him cutting the ribbon instead of taking part in the celebration of the mansion and those who have been invited, accepting the invitation to live within it. If we don’t cut the ribbon, the master will certainly find another to do it—there would be many eager to take that place, many that would be thankful, and a few that would do it in humility as he desired. It’s not as if our declining to cut the ribbon will stop the mansion from being opened. And it’s not as if we built the mansion or made it possible for those called to enter. We simply did our small little part and can thank the master for allowing us to be even a small part of his purpose for this mansion.

As you may easily see, this mansion is Heaven, the master is God, Jesus is the one who has given the invitations and made a way for us to be there, and we are graciously appointed as ribbon cutters or servants in other parts of this glorious scene. Let’s set our eyes upon the Master, the Mansion, and the Way. Let’s glorify the purpose behind our purpose. Let’s “cut the ribbon” obediently and thankfully, seeking that no one would recognize our cutting—that no one would remember a meager human legacy of our own, but that they would instead immediately look to the Mansion of Heaven and Jesus who welcomes them. If we are successful in leaving a legacy that others see as our own and then exalt us because of it, we are doing them a disservice, for we have distracted them from all that is good…we have traded a glimpse of a perfect, loving God, for that of a self-seeking human.

We cannot go incognito our entire lives and live out the Gospel that we are called to live. Some people will notice us, and we have to realize that. What we do with that focus, and before even that—how we pursue God in service in our hearts, seeking our own legacy or instead seeking to leave His pure legacy—these are the things for which we are accountable.

Many of you may say, “I’m not like that, at least not often. I just don’t think of such things.” Very well, I pray that it is because God has worked within you to refine you daily into such a selfless servant. I speak to the many that say, “That’s me—I am convicted that I am always seeking my own. I desire to be changed.” I desire to be changed, too. Let us look to leave the only Pure Legacy—that of Jesus Christ, our Savior who has rescued the most corrupted hearts, like yours and mine. Let’s finally step up to the plate of humility and actually desire within our hearts in our quite moments of absolute honesty to say sincerely “He must become greater. I must become less” (John 3:30). We can struggle and strive, and still we cannot do even that—ask to become less—on our own. The amazing thing about Jesus and our need of Him is that it is so utterly sweeping that not only can I by no means obtain salvation, only accepting it as freely given from Him, but in addition, once saved, I must continually rely on Him to do any good thing in me. I have to decide to want to be changed, and I have to follow through, but I cannot follow through as a matter of pure self-will. I can ask God to change me, and I can will to ask Him, but I must have Him come in, set up shop, and begin to do the changing. And even the desire to be changed is found in the conviction of the Holy Spirit.

And when He has come, He will convict the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment: 9 of sin, because they do not believe in Me; 10 of righteousness, because I go to My Father and you see Me no more; 11 of judgment, because the ruler of this world is judged. – John 16:8-11

How utterly helpless and condemned we are on our own—for we cannot even repent from our sins without His conviction. We need Him to even know that we need Him. He has made it such that all can see and know that He is God, then we need Him to respond to our conviction and cry for help, then we need Him to refine us into the servants He and we desire to be. Jesus said in John 15:5, “Apart from me you can do nothing.” Apart from Him I can do only evil. Apart from Him I will not even know I am evil and will spiral straight to Hell. But with Him, I am convicted. With Him I am saved. With Him I am transformed. With Him, I have no legacy of my own. With Him I am made a part of His pure legacy. With Him, the same is true for you. Forever. Amen.

Spiritual Exhaustion and Starvation – My Personal Testimony

Have you ever had this thought: “If only I didn’t have to take the time to eat and sleep, I’d have plenty of time to do all of these other things I need to do.” I had that thought today, and looking back, I chuckle at it a bit.

Sometimes I get so busy with work and life that I start to lose sleeping hours and scarcely have time to prepare a proper meal for myself. So I end up sleep deprived and eating way too much fast food or other prepared foods—I just don’t have time to do it all. Example: today I was called into work at 5:30am (on a Sunday). The Lord answered my prayer that I would be able to leave work in time to get to church. After church, I had plans to eat, go for a run (I’m training for a 10k), come back to clean my apartment because I found out this morning that I’ll be hosting our men’s group gathering on Tuesday, then off to a friend’s Superbowl party that will finish off the night. You may say, “wow, that’s a lot!” However, this can often be a typical day, and I know that your life may get so busy from time to time. My conviction came when I was leaving Chipotle with my to-go order (side note: I love Chipotle and it’s worth going when I’m not short on time!). I got my food so lightning quick that I was in a very pleasant frame of mind as I thought the following thoughts: “Wow, that was so quick and I needed it to be quick today. If only I didn’t have to take the time to eat at all, or to sleep. If somehow my body could be nourished and given energy by some other means, I’d have so much more time!”

Now, of course those are just thoughts and don’t make any practical sense. My thoughts weren’t based upon sincerely considering them to be possible—they were simply the natural progression of my mind in time-management mode.

Here is the revelation: do we ever treat our spiritual lives the same way? My thoughts regarding going without food and sleep for any length of time are absurd. Sure, for a short time you can do one or both, but eventually we will need both and need them consistently in order to just stay alive, let alone live a healthy life.

We do the same thing when we consider that we are so busy that we don’t have time to read the Word or pray. Realize that the Word of God is our spiritual bread and water. Jesus speaks many times of himself being the living water and bread of life: “And Jesus said to them, ‘I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger, and he who believes in Me shall never thirst.’ (John 6:35)” To eat and drink of Christ is to believe in Him as the perfect Son of God, coming in the flesh, who bore our sin, setting us free and unto eternal life, and to partake of His Spirit. It is to make Him such a part of our bodies that we are an extension of His very self in this world. We do this by confessing we are a sinner, accepting Him as our Savior and receiving the Holy Spirit to indwell us, having “fellowship in His sufferings” (Phil 3:12-12, Rom 8:17), living obediently as ambassadors for Christ, and going to the Bible often. John writes that “the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us, (John 1:14)” referring to Jesus. So we see that if Jesus is our spiritual food and is the Word of God, that God’s Word in the Bible is a source of nourishment for our souls.

Additionally, we are to rest in our Lord and Savior. Jesus said in Matt 11:28, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” How is he to give us rest? When I think of rest, I think of comfort and of relaxation…a place undisturbed, a quiet place…a time where I don’t have to be working hard on anything, and a place of familiarity such as my home. So perhaps going to God in prayer and experiencing rest in Jesus means that He is my comfort and a place of peace and quiet. Perhaps I should get to know Him such that prayer is a place of familiarity and being with Him is like being home. Perhaps resting in Him is where I realize that I do not have to do the hard work—that my salvation is His great gift and He loves me, and I can simply be in His presence, just Him and me.

But what if we lived our physical lives the way that all too many of us live our spiritual lives? How often have you read His Word this week, this month? How often have you prayed and rested in Him? What if I went an entire month on 4 meals and slept only 2 nights? I would likely die or collapse and have to be hospitalized. What if I carried on this way for years? Our bodies would obviously fail us under those conditions. Don’t you think that spiritual lives will be taken to the point of death in the same manner if we are so starved of the Word and of prayer and resting in Him? I think we too often experience these spiritual hunger pains and exhaustion and fail to take action.

Look around—I see frail Christian bodies in the masses of Christians around the world. Spiritual bodies that are gaunt, with skin stretched over ribs, knobby joints, legs that can barely stand, arms that cannot carry their own weight. We are a malnourished culture of Christians in the United States. Take heart, for there are many who stand strong with the full armor of God and spiritual bodies that are growing with the might of Samson. Additionally, many of us are as adolescents with growing bodies and new spiritual muscles all the time. But how long have you merely sat in church, living on that single spiritual “meal” per week? I’ll tell you that I have gone years with that meager nourishment from the Word and perhaps even less rest in His presence. It left me feeble—interestingly, both spiritually and physically, as I was stricken with a disease that nearly took my life. In that time I had lost 40 pounds from a frame that was at my ideal weight. My condition took my entire appetite away and anything that I did actually eat did not strengthen my body as it would a healthy body. This entire experience happened to coincide with the greatest emotional trial I had ever experienced as I worked through the ending of a long-term relationship, making my despair feel complete both physically and emotionally. One day, I got to the point where I was lying on the couch and a pack of crackers was on the table in front of me. I hadn’t eaten in almost two days. I had just slept 14 hours and still barely made it across my apartment from my bed to my couch. I had the slightest desire to eat just 1 or 2 crackers, but I decided that it wasn’t worth the energy to lean forward 12 inches to get them—my body was utterly exhausted, depleted, and failing. Thank the Lord that my mother and I spoke on the phone moments later, and her plea for me to go to the emergency room, combined with what must have been the Lord’s hand on me, gave me the energy to get up and drive down the street to the hospital.

Up to that moment and for months afterward, I experienced the worst pain in my life daily, even hourly. There were things happening in my body that might horrify you—things that unless you are a doctor or someone with medical knowledge, you wouldn’t even think were possible. I remember the night that I prayed the most sincere prayer I have probably ever prayed: “Lord, would you please kill me and let me die?” I knew what would await me upon death: Heaven. I wanted to no longer struggle with this physical body—I so desired to shed it and go to the peace of Heaven. I prayed with sincerity on my bed before falling asleep and truly believed that I would not wake up in the morning, very hopefully expecting to open my eyes in Heaven. But God did not let me die then. I knew in the days that followed that God as my Father desires His children to join Him at home, yet He knows that it is best for both us and His kingdom that we remain here for a time. Similar to a mother or father who’s child has gone overseas to serve the Lord as a missionary—if the parents love their child second to God, they will desire that the child come back home to them, but they would see that it was the Lord’s will for the child to remain at a distance for the time being. And if that child beckoned them to allow a homecoming, the parents would surely agree immediately! So I realized that God heard my cry and desired me to come Home; yet He left me here, and He would only do so if it was best for both Him and me. Additionally, since I could not come “Home,” but He had the means to come to where I am, He would surely do so. So I rested knowing that in my cry for God to let me die, He left me here for a purpose—one that He had in mind for me specifically—and that He would be with me here. Friends, I am not different than any of you—I speak not of some special purpose for me that is unavailable to you and only available to a few. I speak of the fact that we each have a specific purpose for God in this very life and in our everlasting lives in His Kingdom to come.

From the point of going to the emergency room forward, there was a long recovery for my body. I do not know how I made it through, except for the Lord’s presence in my life. Through the experience, I learned what it was to NEED our God. Through the physical and emotional trial, I learned my NEED of a Savior for my sinful soul and of His deep love for me. When no one could comfort me, my God did. When no rest from the pain could be found, rest was found in time with Him. When I could muster no strength of my own, I was sustained by His Word. This was a powerful experience that I will never forget, and I learned the importance of being nourished by God’s Word and the power of resting in Him through prayer. Since that time, my body has been completely restored, perhaps even healthier than before the trial—Praise God alone for this!

I want to encourage you today: feed yourself! Get rest! I should take my own advice and apply it physically. But even more importantly than that, I pray that we would do it for our souls. We are hungry, my friends, and require daily nourishment. We are in need of rest, and require daily re-energizing. Let’s take the initiative to find both nourishment and rest where we know it resides: in God’s Word and in His presence through prayer. Let’s not live starved lives any longer—let’s build our frail frames into strength in Christ. Let’s not live in a state of utter exhaustion any longer—let’s give rest to our weary and heavy laden souls through our comforter, Christ. Let’s make Him our home. In our homes we recharge with food and rest; let’s make Him our home and live in Him daily, inviting Him to live within us perpetually. Times will still get tough and our energy will still wane, but in those times we need even more spiritual “calories” and rest! In my time of physical need, I was spurred onward by another by the Lord’s hand and found help that led to a new healthy body—I pray that today you are spurred onward to seek help where we both know it resides. I knew to go to the emergency room, and I learned to go to the Word and prayer. Whatever your physical needs, I know we are equally needy of the spiritual nourishment and rest that comes only through real relationship with Jesus Christ. Let’s never forget what He has done for us, what we’ve been saved from, and where our livelihood truly resides—in Christ alone. Amen.

In encourage you to meditate upon the lyrics of “In Christ Alone,” in light of the thoughts above:

In Christ Alone
by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend

IN CHRIST ALONE my hope is found,
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This Cornerstone, this solid Ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My Comforter, my All in All,
Here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! – who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save:
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied –
For every sin on Him was laid;
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain:
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine –
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me;
From life’s first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand!

"Powerful and Effective" Prayer - The Presence of God Almighty

“Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. 14 Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven.16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
17 Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. 18 Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.” – James 5:13-17

Why is "the prayer of a righteous person...powerful and effective?" (v. 16)

We often make or hear statements like, “the power of prayer,” or “prayer is the most powerful weapon we have,” or “prayer is the answer.” In fact, I have said those things myself and very much meant them.

The problem is that we often think of it as a means to an end: “if prayer is a weapon and I wield it, then I am victorious,” or even that “then God is victorious.” God is victorious whether or not you or I utter that prayer. God is supreme and sovereign and will never be anything but victorious. We don’t alter His outcome, we choose whether we are identified with Him in eternal victory or alienated from Him in eternal defeat.

We put too much focus on our prayers, the fact that we uttered them, or the words that we’ve chosen. Those things are not at all why the prayers of a righteous person are powerful and effective. They are powerful and effective because in a moment of pure righteous prayer, God is made real in you and me. There is no greater power and effectiveness that you will experience than when Christ is made alive in you. You see, the righteous person that is acting in righteousness goes to God. The going to God is prayer. Therefore, the prayer was not the powerful thing itself—the prayer was a natural outcome of the righteous one’s relationship with God. The righteousness in you and me is what leads us to prayer, and those moments become powerful and effective because through the prayer we have fixed our “eyes upon Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith” (Heb 12:2).

Do you see the difference? The thought that I could pray a mighty prayer to move a spiritual mountain is appealing. But if that is our thought, we’ve missed it…by a little or by a lot, we’ve missed it either way. It’s not that my prayer is powerful and effective because I pray it. It is that God is with the one who enters into sincere prayer, and “if God is for us, who can be against us” (Rom 8:31)? So the specific words or even the topic is less important than just being in the presence of God, just being in sincere prayer—that is the Source of the power and effectiveness—God Himself!

So as we go to prayer this morning or this night or in the middle of our days, let’s remember that the prayers of the righteous are powerful and effective. Let’s remember that we have been made righteous by the blood of Christ to “be holy, for I am holy” (1 Peter 1:16). We could have never attained it, but upon belief Jesus immediately makes us “sons of God” in His righteousness (Rom 8:15-16, Gal 3:26-28, Gal 4:4-6). Knowing that we are made righteous and therefore our prayers are powerful and effective, let’s engage in prayer. But not because they are powerful and effective for our means, but because they are the nourishment of a real relationship with God…they are the pathway to His presence. And it is His presence that is powerful and effective, simple as that.

In His presence, we bow in awe, saying "woe is me, for I have sinned."
In His presence, His light is so bright that we cannot look straight at it.
In His presence, we have natural and healthy fear.
In His presence, He tells us not be afraid, for He has come to cleanse us as His own in love (1 John 4:18).
In His presence, we abandon our personal desires and forsake our selfish pasts.
In His presence, we see clearly in all truth.
In His presence, we learn our true identity in Christ.
In His presence, we pour out in thanksgiving to our Creator and lover of our souls.
In His presence, we are made one with Him as His Spirit is made alive in us.
In His presence, we are aligned with His will and He moves decisively on our behalf and His own.
In His presence, we are transformed powerfully.
In His presence, we are made effective ambassadors of His Word.
In His presence, we are in continual prayer to the uttermost.

So we see that Christ has made those who believe righteous, the righteous will go to Him in prayer, in prayer the righteous will enter His presence, and His presence is powerful and effective. Because of this, the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Amen.

Recognizing and Responding to the Call - Wisdom from Oswald Chambers

"My Utmost For His Highest," Jan 14(http://utmost.org/called-by-god/):

CALLED OF GOD
"Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me." Isaiah 6:8

God did not address the call to Isaiah; Isaiah overheard God saying, "Who will go for us?" The call of God is not for the special few, it is for everyone. Whether or not I hear God's call depends upon the state of my ears; and what I hear depends upon my disposition. "Many are called but few are chosen," that is, few prove themselves the chosen ones. The chosen ones are those who have come into a relationship with God through Jesus Christ whereby their disposition has been altered and their ears unstopped, and they hear the still small voice questioning all the time, "Who will go for us?" It is not a question of God singling out a man and saying, "Now, you go." God did not lay a strong compulsion on Isaiah; Isaiah was in the presence of God and he overheard the call, and realized that there was nothing else for him but to say, in conscious freedom, "Here am I, send me." Get out of your mind the idea of expecting God to come with compulsions and pleadings. When our Lord called His disciples there was no irresistible compulsion from outside. The quiet passionate insistence of His "Follow Me" was spoken to men with every power wide awake. If we let the Spirit of God bring us face to face with God, we too shall hear something akin to what Isaiah heard, the still small voice of God; and in perfect freedom will say, "Here am I; send me."

Pair this up with recent insight from previous days' "My Utmosts:"

"If we obey God, it is going to cost other people more than it costs us, and that is where the pain begins. If we are in love with our Lord, obedience does not cost us anything— it is a delight...
Beware of the inclination to dictate to God what consequences you would allow as a condition of your obedience to Him." - Jan 11

"We seem to think that God wants us to give up things! God purified Abraham from this error, and the same process is at work in our lives. God never tells us to give up things just for the sake of giving them up, but He tells us to give them up for the sake of the only thing worth having, namely, life with Himself." - Jan 8

"He went out, not knowing where he was going —Hebrews 11:8

Have you ever “gone out” in this way? If so, there is no logical answer possible when anyone asks you what you are doing. One of the most difficult questions to answer in Christian work is, “What do you expect to do?”You don’t know what you are going to do. The only thing you know is that God knows what He is doing. Continually examine your attitude toward God to see if you are willing to “go out” in every area of your life, trusting in God entirely...
Have you been asking God what He is going to do? He will never tell you. God does not tell you what He is going to do— He reveals to you who He is." - Jan 2

"There are times when you can’t understand why you cannot do what you want to do. When God brings a time of waiting, and appears to be unresponsive, don’t fill it with busyness, just wait. The time of waiting may come to teach you the meaning of sanctification— to be set apart from sin and made holy— or it may come after the process of sanctification has begun to teach you what service means. Never run before God gives you His direction. If you have the slightest doubt, then He is not guiding. Whenever there is doubt— wait.

At first you may see clearly what God’s will is— the severance of a friendship, the breaking off of a business relationship, or something else you feel is distinctly God’s will for you to do. But never act on the impulse of that feeling. If you do, you will cause difficult situations to arise which will take years to untangle. Wait for God’s timing and He will do it without any heartache or disappointment. When it is a question of the providential will of God, wait for God to move." - Jan 4

I'll admit, I don't have all this put together in my mind yet, either. I know to wait on God, for His timing is perfect. I also know to listen in the waiting and when I hear His still, small voice, to say "Here am I, send me!" I also know that it takes faith, beyond what is certain or logical, such that we will go out like Abraham, "not knowing where he was going." I know that we must count the cost, not just to ourselves to but to loved ones and those around us, and that any cost to us or others is no reason not to obey the call, but rather to prepare our hearts for His work. I know that although the call can bring sacrifice to others and myself, that the call is a delight, for we "Delight [our]selves in the Lord, and he will give [us] desires of [our] heart" (Psalm 37:4). I also know that I cannot dictate what consequences will be conditions of my obedience or what the call may be--but that obedience is our only condition.

The paragraph above is just a brief summary of the "My Utmosts" quoted above, and each is sound and in agreement with the Word. However, how do we apply each of those things correctly, such that we are not either over eager or too hesitant? Again, I'll admit that I'm still figuring it out, but I love to ponder these things and I hope you do, too. I think of it like this:

In the moments before the start of a horse race, each horse is in the gate with the rider poised for the start. But there is silence. Some horses stir a bit, getting anxious for the start--these often get poor starts. Some horses and riders are almost too relaxed or not on full alert, such that when the gate drops, there is a slight enough hesitation to put them in the back of the pack at the start. In any case, all horses and riders are ready to some extent, yet the gate has not been dropped.

Sometimes I think we need to have the attitude of the horse and rider behind the starting gate. We should not try to charge ahead while the gate is in place! We will be disqualified from that race and have to wait for the next one. By the same token, we should make sure we've gotten to the gate and in position, or the race will start without us. But I think we can be like that well-trained horse and rider, ready for the drop of the gate. Until the gate drops, until the Lord makes it clear without a doubt that we are to charge forward, we wait. Immediately upon dropping the gate, immediately upon picking up on that still, small voice, we go out with all we can muster, though we don't know what the race is going to look like--will my horse grab the lead or will I be last? Will the track be slippery? We go out without knowing where we are going, but we go at the drop of the gate. Others will not be chosen by God for this race that we're running, though we may wish that we could run with them. "Run with endurance the race marked out for you" (Heb 12:1). We may feel that we wanted to go with others on their races before us (their calls), or that we want to bring others and not "leave them behind" in our own minds, but God has called each to a race marked out for them. We cannot consider what it is costing them or us to run this race--we simply run the race marked out for us. And though we do not know all the consequences and there was sacrifice in leaving our comfortable stables to get out on the edge in the race, putting ourselves at risk, we can forget all the other distractions and realize the great exhilaration of the race--we are running with the wind in our faces! But only if we have gone through the life-long training, only if we've taken our place at the starting gate, only if we've waited for the gate to drop, and only if we'll charge forward when the gate is dropped, knowing perhaps little more than that a gate has been dropped, we are here and equipped by our Master Trainer, and we must run the race He has marked out for us.

All of the above alludes a specific call for ministry. As if we as riders and horses are committing to something new and different that is full-time ministry. Indeed, this fits, I believe, and you and I may very well need to read it that way. However, we might want to examine in what way we define "full-time ministry." When you hear that, I'm sure you think of pastors and missionaries, etc. Indeed, they are included. But could you be in full-time ministry right where you are? Could you be an engineer, school teacher, doctor, or lawyer in full-time ministry right now? I believe the answer is "yes." We often think about "going out without knowing" as being discarding all for the sake of a career in ministry. That may very well be your call--do not dismiss it if He is asking! And if you're unsure, then you can still start in obedience by making your life and career full-time ministry right now. The difference is attitude and approach to the work day. The difference is attitude and approach to friendships. The difference is attitude and approach in your thought life. We can "take every thought captive" (2 Cor 10:5) in the working world, doing everything "...with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters" (Col 3:23) being ambassadors for Christ every day.

I do not want to discount the calling to pastors and missionaries here. I believe that as many will read this, less are going to commit to such service for God than He has called. "Many are called, but few are chosen." As O.C. writes, few prove themselves chosen by responding to the call. In encourage you, in whatever way the Holy Spirit is guiding you right now, do the following:

- Listen for God continually while you wait and as you go out
- Wait for the Lord's direction that you KNOW is from Him
- When you act in obedience, go out without knowing or being hindered by the consequences for you and others
- Check to make sure that whatever the sacrifice, you still have the full joy of the Lord
- Start living for Him in full-time ministry right where you are today
- At any snare, at any success, at all times, "pray without ceasing" (1 Thess 5:17)

If you can satisfy these conditions, I believe that the Lord has you right where He wants you, your life will never be the same and for the better, and we are one step closer to walking down the path of His preferred will.

If this is all confusing, I understand. You might throw everything written here out the window and do just one thing: pray. You don't need me or anyone else to tell you what God can tell you Himself through prayer and sincere study of His Word. I write these things to be a catalyst in your relationship to Him, not at all to be a substitute. Your inspiration can start while reading here or "My Utmost" or any other Christian writing, but it must immediately be fed by the Source, God Himself. This is endeavored through prayer and Scripture.

May the Holy Spirit speak to you today, and may we both respond to His voice in the way that is most pleasing to our Father in Heaven. Amen.

From "Against you alone have I sinned" to "For you alone do I live"

From the Jan 4 “My Utmost for His Highest,” (http://www.myutmost.org/01/0104.html) –

Peter said to Him, ’Lord, why can I not follow You now?’ —John 13:37

“Peter did not wait for God. He predicted in his own mind where the test would come, and it came where he did not expect it. “I will lay down my life for Your sake.” Peter’s statement was honest but ignorant. “Jesus answered him, ’ . . . the rooster shall not crow till you have denied Me three times’ ” (John 13:38). This was said with a deeper knowledge of Peter than Peter had of himself. He could not follow Jesus because he did not know himself or his own capabilities well enough. Natural devotion may be enough to attract us to Jesus, to make us feel His irresistible charm, but it will never make us disciples. Natural devotion will deny Jesus, always falling short of what it means to truly follow Him.”

This “My Utmost” is very challenging and convicting to me. “Natural devotion will deny Jesus, always falling short of what it means to truly follow Him.” I know this full-well. We have to get beyond “natural” devotion. The kind of devotion that is excited and inspired and purely emotional at the beginning, but fades with time, or the kind of devotion that is to a cause, however noble, or to the amazing blessing or gains that we may see personally from such a devotion. This is any devotion short of sincere commitment to Jesus Himself, leading to strict obedience to His Word and a sincere desire to know Him more.

“For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. 4For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world— our faith.” – 1 John 5:3-4 (see also John 14:15, 21, 23).

Again, this is more than emotional response and much, much more than a desire for the good things that such a relationship brings to my life. This is commitment to Him, at the risk of abandoning all that I consider to be my own. “Against you and you alone have I sinned” (Psalm 51:4). This is an interesting and true Bible verse, as David writes that against God, and God alone has he sinned. In addition to sinning against God, we think about sinning against our family, friends, or strangers because of the hurt it might cause them, or perhaps because of some good fortune at their expense, whether they know it or not. But this verse reveals that our only sin is against God.

Have you ever put a stake in the ground and said, “I will sin no more,” or “I will not commit this sin anymore, starting right now!” And you last for hours, days, maybe even months…but sometime down the road you and I failed to keep that commitment? Why is that? Because there was even the smallest element of “natural devotion” short of holy devotion to God Himself. Often we realize in those times that we are deprived of something and we want to change that. Sometimes we use a loved one in our lives as motivation not to commit that hurtful sin (whether it be outbursts of anger, infidelity, lying, or an obvious impurity in your heart or other sin). These motivations may seem noble, but in the end they lead to failure. This is because the motivation must extend to this: “Against you and you alone have I sinned.” If our aim is anything short of devotion to God in obedience to Him for HIS sake, then we will fall.

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! 13 No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” – 1 Cor 10:12-13

To whom are we committed? To our Father who is with us to strengthen us to withstand all temptation that we might face? If not, then we will not stand. If so, then we will surely stand. The struggle then, isn’t against sin or to stay motivated and devoted to the cause or the person that we are abstaining from sin for…the struggle is to remain wholly devoted to the only One who can save us and can strengthen us such that we are “more than conquerors” (Rom 8:37). This “One” is Jesus Christ. When our daily motivation to lead a holy life reaches a point where our thoughts are purely for God and living for Him, recognizing our weakness even in our strongest moments and our need for Him, we have a foothold that will never slip. For most of us, this is a life-long struggle, which is the source of “work out your salvation” (Phil 2:12). Our salvation was immediate and permanent upon receiving Christ (Eph 1:13-14, 4:30, 2 Cor 2:21-22). Yet, we must work out that salvation in the daily struggle with sin, and our victory is in supernatural devotion to Jesus, imparted to sincere hearts that truly seek Him first and above all else, realizing that “against you and you alone have I sinned,” and therefore when I live righteously, it is because for You and You alone do I live. Amen.