What is manliness? What is manhood?
A friend of mine recently gave me his copy of Fathered by God, by John Eldridge. Have you ever received a book half marked up and underlined, with an abrupt end to the markings? If you have, you know the special privilege of receiving a book from someone while they are still in the middle of reading it themselves. If you’ve ever given a book away like that, you know the sacrifice parting with your beloved copy containing all of your meaningful notes and markers. When you receive a book like that, you know one thing: if it meant that much to the giver, such that they would abandon their personal copy in the middle of reading so that you could have it, you know that you need to begin reading it right away.
And so I have recently begun reading Fathered by God, which has been both very instructional and very enjoyable. As I was reading tonight, I came across this passage:
As I put my name in place of Ephraim, the verse really does come alive. So much so, that at the end of the verse, I didn’t get a warm-fuzzy feeling…instead, I found myself saying, “That just doesn’t sound very manly.”
Now, these are God’s words to His beloved children—if there is any conception of manliness as we understand it that is good, God certainly is the source! Therefore, these words aren’t just manly; they are above and beyond manly! Yet, I found myself a little uncomfortable with being told “softly and tenderly I wait for [you]” by my Father God.
And that’s when I was convicted of how far off-center my personal view of manliness has been warped. That is when I realized the answer to the question, “What is true manliness?”
If man is made in the image of God, then true manliness is “image-of-God-liness.” True manhood is “image-of-God-hood.” When we as a culture and individuals stop looking to other men to define manhood and manliness and instead look to the pursuit of God, then and only then will we as a culture and individuals lay hold of what it truly means to be a man.
And so, what is manliness? True manliness, as we were created to be, is nothing other than the character of God. If man is created in the image of God, then the character of God seen in men would be the image of true manliness. And so the question of "what is manliness?" is answered by the character traits of God. God is Good. God is Just. God is Strong. God is Tenderhearted. God is Full of Grace. God is Steadfast. God is Faithful. God is Love. You, my fellow man, were created to be all of these things, too.
So man-up and receive the love of your Father God who “softly and tenderly” waits for you. Reject that part of you that says, “that doesn’t sound manly” and embrace it as the only true manhood. I pray that we both live up to our image-of-God-liness legacy, passed down from our Father God, such that we, too can one day say to our sons, “softly and tenderly I wait for you. I love you.” Amen.
A friend of mine recently gave me his copy of Fathered by God, by John Eldridge. Have you ever received a book half marked up and underlined, with an abrupt end to the markings? If you have, you know the special privilege of receiving a book from someone while they are still in the middle of reading it themselves. If you’ve ever given a book away like that, you know the sacrifice parting with your beloved copy containing all of your meaningful notes and markers. When you receive a book like that, you know one thing: if it meant that much to the giver, such that they would abandon their personal copy in the middle of reading so that you could have it, you know that you need to begin reading it right away.
And so I have recently begun reading Fathered by God, which has been both very instructional and very enjoyable. As I was reading tonight, I came across this passage:
“ ‘Oh! Ephraim is my dear, dear son, my child in whom I take pleasure! Every time I mention his name, my heart bursts with longing for him! Everything in me cries out for him. Softly and tenderly I wait for him. (Jer 31:20 MSG)’
Put your own name in this verse, in place of “Ephraim” (a name for God’s people, and that includes you).”
As I put my name in place of Ephraim, the verse really does come alive. So much so, that at the end of the verse, I didn’t get a warm-fuzzy feeling…instead, I found myself saying, “That just doesn’t sound very manly.”
Now, these are God’s words to His beloved children—if there is any conception of manliness as we understand it that is good, God certainly is the source! Therefore, these words aren’t just manly; they are above and beyond manly! Yet, I found myself a little uncomfortable with being told “softly and tenderly I wait for [you]” by my Father God.
And that’s when I was convicted of how far off-center my personal view of manliness has been warped. That is when I realized the answer to the question, “What is true manliness?”
Gen 1:26 – “God said, let us make man in our image…”
If man is made in the image of God, then true manliness is “image-of-God-liness.” True manhood is “image-of-God-hood.” When we as a culture and individuals stop looking to other men to define manhood and manliness and instead look to the pursuit of God, then and only then will we as a culture and individuals lay hold of what it truly means to be a man.
And so, what is manliness? True manliness, as we were created to be, is nothing other than the character of God. If man is created in the image of God, then the character of God seen in men would be the image of true manliness. And so the question of "what is manliness?" is answered by the character traits of God. God is Good. God is Just. God is Strong. God is Tenderhearted. God is Full of Grace. God is Steadfast. God is Faithful. God is Love. You, my fellow man, were created to be all of these things, too.
So man-up and receive the love of your Father God who “softly and tenderly” waits for you. Reject that part of you that says, “that doesn’t sound manly” and embrace it as the only true manhood. I pray that we both live up to our image-of-God-liness legacy, passed down from our Father God, such that we, too can one day say to our sons, “softly and tenderly I wait for you. I love you.” Amen.
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